Movies, Opinions — May 22, 2012 at 6:55 am

True Vampires: 6 Modern Monsters You Don’t Want To Run Into

Ina Tuason

No, I am not talking about that sparkly he-who-shall-not-be-named fairy from the series of books that has spawned 4 (going on 5) painful movies. I am referring to actual blood sucking creatures who you definitely don’t want to see on your street. Because well, they will actually try kill you. This is a post that will defend the ruined reputation of modern vampires, and show that they still are as bad-a** as before.

Tom Cruise As Lestat (photo from Warner Bros)

1. Lestat de Lioncourt

Origin: Main character for most of Anne Rice’ “The Vampire Chronicles” series. 2 movie adaptations and even a musical.

Special Abilities: Other than the ability to kill anyone he wants, he can also sing pretty well. He became a rock star at one point in time.

Why you don’t want to meet him: He will court with his charming personality. You will become best friend, travel the world together and you will fall in love with this friendship. But one day, you will find yourself regretting everything because he can turn into a psychotic jealous freak who will destroy anything that gets in his way.

Colin Farrell as Jerry Dandridge (photo from Touchstone Pictures)

2. Jerry Dandridge

Origin: The handsome yet secretive next door neighbor in “Fright Night”. The movie was so awesome that there even was a reboot starring Anton Yelchin and Colin Farrell.

Special Abilities: His vampire form is quite a scary site. You will forget about his good looks the moment he flashes his fangs at you. Oh, and he is pretty ruthless and will kill you in the most painful way.

Why you don’t want to meet him: Once he knows that you know he’s a vampire, he will make it his life’s goal to make yours a living hell. Either that or well, killing you. He will also turn your best friend against you by making him a monster too.

Joseph Morgan as Niklaus (photo from The CW)

3. Niklaus

Origin: He’s a thousand year old “Original” vampire from The CW hit series “The Vampire Diaries”.  A villain so good that the show just can’t seem to kill him off for good.

Special Abilities: He’s actually part werewolf, therefore his bite can kill any vampire that tries to stop him. Nothing can ever kill him (except well for maybe the wood of a certain tree that’s already extinct, or so we think).

Why you don’t want to meet him: Okay, number one: if you are a werewolf, he will turn you into a hybrid just like himself. (And really, who actually wants to live an eternity as a vampire-werewolf hybrid?). Number two: if you happen to be one of the Petrova Dopplegangers, he will use up all of your blood to create more hybrids. Number three: if you are just a normal average person, he will use you selfishly to get what he wants.

Alexander Skarsgard as Eric Northman (photo from HBO)

4. Eric Northman

Origin: The former viking who made his way to Bon Temps, Louisiana where he became the vampire sheriff. He was first introduced in the “Southern Vampire Mysteries” by Charlaine Harris.

Special Abilities: Besides his stallion-esque good looks, he can also fly. He is also a pretty decent bar manager.

Why you don’t want to meet him: His only weakness is a cute little Southern girl names Sookie Stackhouse. He will do anything, even maybe kill you, just to make sure she is safe. It is best to stay away from those two if you care about your life.

Kate Beckinsale as Selene (photo from Screen Gems)

5. Selene

Origin: The main character from the “Underworld” series.

Special Abilities: This girl knows to fight! Not to mention, she also knows how to handle a gun. A fight with her could your last moment alive.

Why you don’t want to meet her: While she is generally not as harmful to humans as other,s getting in her way can get you into some dire consequences. Especially if you are from the Lycan group and are stopping her from seeing her one true love. The best idea is to not get involved in anything that has her included in it.

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